== The $400 Laptop Is Coming! ==
TwoHundredDollarLaptopSmall.jpg
=== A Laptop for the Elite ===
The two hundred dollar laptop competes
with the OLPC and the CMPC by providing **better performance** and **more features**
for those who **can afford** it.
The right laptop for your spoiled brats
Now for just $400!
=== A $rich$ set of features ===
* wide-screen 16" display, **2000 ANSI lumen** for perfect visibility while facing the sun
* dual-core SMP: **AMD Geode** + **Intel ULV** -- no need to choose!
* dual-channel, **Double Data Rate** Corsair PC200 memory
* dual-keyboard with **independent layouts**: type both in US and JP at the same time!
* dual-flash **RAID1 storage technology** for improved data reliability!
* dual-boot with GRUB in the OS of your choice: preloaded with '''Ubloantu Linux''' and '''Windows EXbedded''' -- NEW!
* Patented WI-FI Fonero technology: choose to be '''both a Bill and a Linus'''!
* UAC-CCS DRM and copy protection scheme for your **Genuine Advantage**!
* Triple trackpad: simultaneously use both your hands and your nose!
* Dual lead-acid **hot-swappable** battery packs for improved mileage!
* Dual **firewall-webfilter**: only access our PG-rated marketing web sites!
* Online library of downloadable politically correct, violence free, pointless **video games**!
* Automatically **charge your credit card** on every purchase made by your child!
(Designed by the '''Department of Redundancy Departmenet''')
=== Smart Computer, Dumb Kid ===
This laptop has been designed from the ground up for the children of rich consumist countries:
the computer that grows along with your kids (*).
[*] we'll make sure you will have to upgrade it every year!
Charity is for wimps!
Join the "Give 0 Get 2" program!
See for yourself from this independent market analysis:
|| || competitor || **G0G2** ||
|| //You spend// || $400 || **$399.99** ||
|| //You give// || 1 || **0** ||
|| //You GET// || 1 || **2** ||
|| //Pay per view// || na || **automatically charged on your card** ||
=== What others are saying ===
"They want me to be a whore!"
-- //Linus Torvalds//
"He doesn't scare me as much as he scares others."
-- //Richard Stallman//
"Jesus Christ, who are these people?"
-- //Bill Gates//
"I don't remember agreeing to that."
-- //Janet Reno//
"This is horseshit. Horseshit, horseshit, horseshit. And for those of you who don't know what that means, it's the shit that comes from a horse!"
-- //Greg, Columbia Internet//
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