X-Git-Url: https://codewiz.org/gitweb?p=wiki.git;a=blobdiff_plain;f=TwoHundredDollarLaptop;h=1a539241b3a964317f51618f050496fb1befc354;hp=ff1face5efd73db778053417c72891b4c4194a48;hb=727dee2f26db42100bc82f418ca47dfc409485dd;hpb=50fdca7ff89e0452641a93c2e6539ea7c22d316e diff --git a/TwoHundredDollarLaptop b/TwoHundredDollarLaptop index ff1face..1a53924 100644 --- a/TwoHundredDollarLaptop +++ b/TwoHundredDollarLaptop @@ -1,17 +1,23 @@ -== The $200 Laptop Is Coming! == +#css TwoHundredDollarLaptop.css -//"We are putting a deluxe laptop in the hands of every lucky child in the world!"// -- **Ebenezer Negroponte**, CEO +OneWindozePerChild.png +== The $200 Laptop is Coming! == -
TwoHundredDollarLaptopSmall.jpg
+//"We are putting a deluxe laptop in the hands of every lucky child in the world!"// -- **Ebenezer Scrooge**, TLPC CEO + + +TwoHundredDollarLaptopSmall.jpg + +
Picture courtesy of MassimoSantoro (sue him, sue him!)
=== A Laptop for the Elite ===
-The $200 laptop aims to create heathy **free competition** with inferior products on the market such as the **OLPC** and the **CMPC** by providing **better performance** and **more features** -for all those who **can afford** it.
+The $200 laptop aims to create healthy **free competition** by providing **better performance** and **more features** +for those who **can afford** it. -
the right laptop for your spoiled brats
+
the right laptop for your spoiled brats
now for just $400!
=== A $rich$ set of features === @@ -19,22 +25,22 @@ for all those who **can afford** it. Our first product, the **XOXO**, comes with:
- * wide-screen 16" display, **2000 ANSI lumen** for perfect visibility while facing the sun + * wide-screen 16" display, **2000 ANSI lumen** for perfect visibility even in full sunlight * dual-core SMP: **AMD Geode** + **Intel ULV** -- no need to choose! * dual-channel, **Double Data Rate** Corsair PC200 memory - * dual-keyboard with **independent layouts**: type both in US and JP at the same time! + * dual-keyboard with **independent layouts**: type both in US and JP at the same time! (PATENT PENDING IN NIGERIA) * dual-flash **RAID1 storage technology** for improved data reliability! - * dual-boot with GRUB in the OS of your choice: preloaded with '''Ubloantu Linux''' and '''Windows EXbedded''' -- NEW! - * Patented WI-FI Fonero technology: choose to be '''both a Bill and a Linus'''! + * dual-boot with GRUB in the OS of your choice: preloaded with **Ubloantu Linux** and **Windows EXbedded** -- NEW! + * Patented WI-FI Fonero technology: choose to be **both a Bill and a Linus**! * UAC-CCS DRM and copy protection scheme for your **Genuine Advantage**! - * Triple trackpad: simultaneously use both your hands and your nose! + * **Giant** triple-trackpad: simultaneously control up to 3 players in MMRPGs! * Dual lead-acid **hot-swappable** battery packs for improved mileage! - * Dual **firewall-webfilter**: only access our PG-rated marketing web sites! + * Dual **firewall/webfilter**: only access our PG-rated marketing web sites! * Online library of downloadable politically correct, violence free, pointless **video games**! * Automatically **charge your credit card** on every purchase made by your child!
-(Designed by the '''Department of Redundancy Departmenet''') +Designed by the **Department of Redundancy Department**. === Smart Computer, Dumb Kid === @@ -42,16 +48,18 @@ Our first product, the **XOXO**, comes with: If you really **love** your kids, then you **must** buy them the **best** on the market! -Designed from the ground up for the children of rich consumist countries: -the laptop that grows along with your kids (*). +Designed from the ground up for the children of rich consumer countries: +the laptop that grows along with your kids*. With twice as many features, your children will learn **twice as much**! Think about it, you **know** it's true! -
+
+ [*] we'll make sure you will have to upgrade it every year! +
=== Charity is for wimps! === @@ -68,21 +76,25 @@ See for yourself from this independent market analysis: || //You GET// || 1 XO || **1 XOXO** || || //Pay per view// || na || **charged on your card** || +=== A glimpse into the future === + +The TLPC Consortium is proud to unveil its UpcomingProducts roadmap, +with **enhanced collaboration and document sharing features**. + === What others are saying === -//"They want me to be a whore!"// --- Linus Torvalds +//I don't smoke nearly as much crack as I'm accused of// +-- CosmicPenguin -//"He doesn't scare me as much as he scares others."// --- Richard Stallman +//"When are we going to stop prototyping and start writing code for real?"// +-- DavidWoodhouse -//"Jesus Christ, who are these people?"// --- Bill Gates +//"The wisdom of allowing Java programs to mess with physical memory is not a topic which should need further discussion here."// +-- JonathanCorbet on the LWN Kernel Page -//"I don't remember agreeing to that."// --- Janet Reno +//"They want me to be a whore!"// +-- LinusTorvalds -//"This is horseshit. Horseshit, horseshit, horseshit. And for those of you who don't know what that means, it's the shit that comes from a horse!"// --- Greg, Columbia Internet +--- -Visit our [[http://www.mslinux.org/ | Sponsor]] +Visit our [[http://www.mslinux.org/ | secret sponsor]]