1 #css TwoHundredDollarLaptop.css
5 == The $200 Laptop is Coming! ==
7 //"We are putting a deluxe laptop in the hands of every lucky child in the world!"// -- **Ebenezer Scrooge**, TLPC CEO
10 TwoHundredDollarLaptopSmall.jpg
12 <div style="font-size: small;">Picture courtesy of MassimoSantoro (sue him, sue him!)</div>
14 === A Laptop for the Elite ===
16 <div style="font-size: 18pt">
17 The $200 laptop aims to create healthy **free competition** by providing **better performance** and **more features**
18 for those who **can afford** it.</div>
20 <div style="font-weight: bold; font-size: 24pt; color: green; text-align: center">the right laptop for your spoiled brats</div>
21 <div style="font-weight: bold; font-size: 24pt; color: red; text-align: center">now for just $400!</div>
23 === A $rich$ set of features ===
25 Our first product, the **XOXO**, comes with:
27 <div style="font-size: 16pt">
28 * wide-screen 16" display, **2000 ANSI lumen** for perfect visibility even in full sunlight
29 * dual-core SMP: **AMD Geode** + **Intel ULV** -- no need to choose!
30 * dual-channel, **Double Data Rate** Corsair PC200 memory
31 * dual-keyboard with **independent layouts**: type both in US and JP at the same time! <span style="font-size: small; color: red">(PATENT PENDING IN NIGERIA)</span>
32 * dual-flash **RAID1 storage technology** for improved data reliability!
33 * dual-boot with GRUB in the OS of your choice: preloaded with **Ubloantu Linux** and **Windows EXbedded** -- <span style="color: red">NEW!</span>
34 * Patented WI-FI Fonero technology: choose to be **both a Bill and a Linus**!
35 * UAC-CCS DRM and copy protection scheme for your **Genuine Advantage**!
36 * **Giant** triple-trackpad: simultaneously control up to 3 players in MMRPGs!
37 * Dual lead-acid **hot-swappable** battery packs for improved mileage!
38 * Dual **firewall/webfilter**: only access our PG-rated marketing web sites!
39 * Online library of downloadable politically correct, violence free, pointless **video games**!
40 * Automatically **charge your credit card** on every purchase made by your child!
43 Designed by the **Department of Redundancy Department**.
45 === Smart Computer, Dumb Kid ===
47 <div style="font-size: 14pt">
49 If you really **love** your kids, then you **must** buy them the **best** on the market!
51 Designed from the ground up for the children of rich consumer countries:
52 the laptop that grows along with your kids*.
54 With twice as many features, your children will learn **twice as much**!
55 Think about it, you **know** it's true!
59 <div style="font-size: 6pt; color: gray">
61 [*] we'll make sure you will have to upgrade it every year!
65 === Charity is for wimps! ===
67 <div style="font-weight: bold; font-size: 24pt; text-align: center">
68 Join our original "<span style="color: red">GIVE 0, GET 2</span>" program NOW!
71 See for yourself from this independent market analysis:
73 || || competitor || **G0G2** ||
74 || //You spend// || $400 || **$399.99** ||
75 || //You give// || 1 XO || **0** ||
76 || //You GET// || 1 XO || **1 XOXO** ||
77 || //Pay per view// || na || **charged on your card** ||
79 === A glimpse into the future ===
81 The TLPC Consortium is proud to unveil its UpcomingProducts roadmap,
82 with **enhanced collaboration and document sharing features**.
84 === What others are saying ===
86 //I don't smoke nearly as much crack as I'm accused of//
89 //"When are we going to stop prototyping and start writing code for real?"//
92 //"The wisdom of allowing Java programs to mess with physical memory is not a topic which should need further discussion here."//
93 -- JonathanCorbet on the LWN Kernel Page
95 //"They want me to be a whore!"//
100 Visit our [[http://www.mslinux.org/ | secret sponsor]]